Tuesday, December 15, 2009

The Tide is High...

But I'm holding on. Or something like that.

I've had a little wine tonight, including a Tobin James Fat Boy...you are what you drink, you know.
Retro wine-drinking Elliott, but a fine simulation of this evening.

I feel as though I've neglected you, dear reader. Don't worry, though, I'm still here. Lots of stuff going on, so I'm sorry if you feel like you're last on my list. You're not.


Trying to coordinate a home sale, a move, and finding a new home 2300 miles away takes its toll.

I haven't posted recipes lately, because even though it's 82 degrees outside, I've moved into hibernation mode, and I'm rocking the comfort food like nobody's business. This means roasts and mashed potatoes, food that doubles as childhood memories, and cookies. Really. I've eaten an entire pumpkin pie in the last week.
My mom, sister and brother-in-law visited last weekend, spoiled the dammit beyond all fairness, and we went to see manatees and stingrays and tarpon and such down by the electric plant. It was almost relaxing enough that I forgot what my password was on Monday. Their visit was enough to wash the foul taste of last week's plumbing mishaps from my mind.

And now, in less than a week (by hours, at least) we'll be back in the homeland, the frozen tundra, the great white north: Wisconsin. Even though I'll be working for three of those days, that still means six days of freezing temps, icy sidewalks and windshields, and at least one trip to a trashy corner bar. Good times.

Because I had time off, my whole calendar is screwed up. I wrote Monday's post on Saturday, thinking I was running late. I never got around to last week's fun fact. Did you notice? I'd like to pretend you did.

And a final, caring, special holiday note courtesy of the bottle of red I had this evening. TLC, knock it the hell off.
We already tolerate the Duggars, grit our teeth through Jon and Kate. We humor you when you run not one, but two separate series involving little people. We sit idly by when you rip off 'beloved' Food Network shows. But did we really need this? Not a rhetorical question. We do not.
Call me surly, leave me coal in my stocking, don't care. I think we've had enough.

Enough reality television, that is, not wine. Can't have enough of that.

On a positive holiday note, I've been toying with a special Christmas contest for you, oh dear reader. Oh, happy meat! Oh, happy soul!

Stay tuned.


the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

Really? Midgets making candy?

Santa DOES answer all your holiday wishes!

dogimo said...

Spaghetti sandwich, huh?

I had that idea years ago. Well, my blessings be upon you. I hope you do more with it than I did.

Whoop! Bad news from Google, bro: Food Network rooked us both:


carissajaded said...

Ummm... i might have to watch that show. I have never watched these shows about people who have a lot of babies, but I'm a fan of the midgets.. err little people.

And I've missed you!!

Elliott said...

Mjenks, that wasn't on my Christmas list...

Dogimo - spaghetti sandwiches have been part of the diet since I was a small child. Leave it to Food Network to take the spontenaity out of it all.

Carissa - thanks for missing me. I still think the show is wrong.

Sarah J. Bradley said...

Elliott, that pic of you is making me laugh! The look on your face is priceless! I'm with you about TLC. I love the Duggars, but yes, they are totally ripping of The Food Network. And not doing it well, BTW.

Oh, and yes, we're in a complete deep freeze up here. Bring your serious socks, that's all I can say.

Nej said...

Little people making chocolate?? That's a joke, right? Not a real show...please tell me that's not a real show. Please? What are the networks trying to say...that anything, as long as a little person does it, is worthy of it's own television show.

What's next....Little People Couch Potatoes? "Sit back and enjoy watching your favorite little people while they sit back and enjoy their favorite shows?"


Elliott said...

Sarah, that's my go-to face for any family photos. That's why it also made my Christmas card.

Nej, I swear they were advertising the hell out of it during Duggarfest last night. (And I only had that on because I was drinking and blogging, not watching.) It must be real.

The only way you'll get me to watch is if they use something from the original Willy Wonka as the theme song.

Nej said...

"Oompa Loompa doompadee doo"

D*mn, now THAT'S stuck in my head. :-) :-)

Cary said...

Ha, I do occasional work for TLC and actually did a couple of promos for one of the midg-- er, little people shows (I'd rather not say which one).

I know, I suck. Pays the bills, man.

Elliott said...

Paying the bills without resorting to anything illegal is always honorable. Someone has to write those things.

And Nej, that's exactly the type of thing that would make me watch.

Bev said...

How did I miss a photo of Drunken Elliott?! Have my #1 Commenter card revoked, man, because I suck.

Next up on TLC: The Keeblers. They're tiny, they live in a big tree, and they make delicious cookies!

Be nice and share!

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