Fun Fact Friday - Bilirubin the Kid

As I may have mentioned, I recently became both a grampa and an uncle.  This leads to all sorts of additions to my vocabulary, including terms that should never be used in polite company (i.e. mucus plug).

Grace, my niece, spent an extra day in the hospital when they couldn't find a bilirubin blanket.  Apparently, those things are a hot commodity.  Jordan's bilirubin levels climbed once he was home, but both wee little childrens are healthy now.

Jaundice is caused by a processing inbalance.  Bilirubin (the artist formerly known as hematoidin) is a naturally occuring product of the body, created when red blood cells break down.  Because babies produce red blood cells at a quicker rate than adults, they produce a higher bilirubin-to-weight ratio than adults.  Bilirubin is processed through the liver, and eventually gets pooped out.  (Not tired, but excreted.  Don't you love the ambiguity of the English language?)

Babies can't always process bilirubin efficiently, because their livers haven't developed completely (in the case of premature birth), or because they don't manage to poop efficiently. 

In more serious cases, jaundice can be caused by an infection, or by other disorders of the thyroid.  It's also possible when a newborn doesn't get enough breast milk, or, in the case of an Rh-factor mismatch, when a mother's milk actually creates antibodies that damage the child's red blood cells.

So maybe this isn't a 'fun' fact, but it is a common occurence, and when treated properly, children can come through it without any permanent damage.

As for permanent damage, however, I'm not sure which is worse: me EVER hearing the words 'mucus plug' (DON'T Google it.  No good can come of that) or my brother-in-law inadvertently seeing the placenta drop.

Update - As Frank was so kind to point out, I never talked about how the Biliblanket works. Imagine TRON. UV light can be used to convert the subcutaneous bilirubin to other byproducts that break down and metabolize without the help of the liver. While looking like Flynn or Yori.

I always wanted one of those light cycles.

Fun Fact Friday - That aught a do it!

Imagine if you will, a time in human history where there was no zero. That's right, somehow because of that, you couldn't have ten of anything. You could have five twice, and nine plus one, but nine plus one didn't equal anything. BECAUSE THERE WAS NO ZERO. No aught, no nil, no zilch, zip or nada. Of course, there was a period that there were no negative numbers, too, which is nice because you can't overdraw your checking account. (But since you can't have more than $9 in the account at any time, does it matter?)

About 5,000 years ago, the Sumerians started inserting a placeholder into large numbers to signify the existence of this important nothing. (Like writing '5000', for example.) This placeholder looked a little more like an italic equals sign than an elipse. According to Robert Kaplan, author of The Nothing That Is: A Natural History of Zero, the symbol changed over time as positional notation (for which zero was crucial), made its way to the Babylonian empire and from there to India, via the Greeks (in whose own culture zero made a late and only occasional appearance; the Romans had no trace of it at all). Arab merchants brought the zero they found in India to the West.

The zero gives us power. We accomplish so much just by its existence. To quote Charles Seife in his book Zero: The Biography of a Dangerous Idea, "Dividing by zero...allows you to prove, mathematically, anything in the universe. You can prove that 1+1=42, and from there you can prove that J. Edgar Hoover is a space alien, that William Shakespeare came from Uzbekistan, or even that the sky is polka-dotted. (See appendix A for a proof that Winston Churchill was a carrot.)"

I don't know about you, but it makes me want to read Appendix A.

Of course, as these things always go, I set out to learn more about one thing, and end up learning about something else entirely.

In this case, I got to learn about the Erdős-Bacon number.

Yes, that Bacon.

A person's Erdős–Bacon number is a concept which reflects the small world phenomenon in academia and entertainment. It is the sum of one's Erdős number—which measures the "collaborative distance" in authoring mathematical papers between that person and Hungarian mathematician Paul Erdős...(yes, that Paul Erdős)—and one's Bacon number—which represents the number of links, through roles in films, by which the individual is separated from American actor Kevin Bacon. The lower the number, the closer a person is to Erdős and Bacon.

For example, Carl Sagan has an Erdős-Bacon number of six. So does Danica McKellar.

Stephen Hawking has an Erdős-Bacon number of seven.

While Natalie Portman's number is six.Oh, and did I mention Danica McKellar's number is a six, too?

I may have.

By extrapolation, this means that two-thirds of all Erdős-Bacon number "six" holders are the hawtness.

Hey, with zero, anything is possible.

Fun Fact Friday - Black velvet and a little boy smile

Since I posted about fine art theft yesterday, I thought we'd stay in the artistic vein, and discuss some of the finest art known to man.
I'm talking about Cassius Coolidge's famed 1903 series of Dogs Playing Poker.
Someone has WAAAAYYY too much time and patience.

Of course, only nine of the sixteen paintings depict anthropomorphic (thanks, Mr. Ceci!) dogs at cards, the others show the canines playing pool and pursuing other manly activities of the early 20th century, like riding goats. What?Brown & Bigelow, the same company that published Norman Rockwell's works, commissioned the paintings in order to sell cigars. Makes perfect sense to me. Of course, what really sets these paintings apart from other likenesses to have graced the ebony velveteen was the February 2005 sale of a pair of these paintings for $590,400. Take that, Elvis hangin' with Jesus!
Coolidge also invented and marketed the greatest photo op mankind has ever known, the novelty he called Comic Foregrounds, for which he was granted a patent. These foregrounds are the familiar life-sized portraits with holes located where the head should be. The patrons stick their head through the hole and are transformed into a strong man, beautiful woman, or immersed in a fantasy scene. Today they are common around carnivals and tourist traps. Coolidge made hundreds of different paintings for these foregrounds, some of which had titles such as "Man Riding a Donkey" or "Fat Man in a Bathing Suit." He started a mail order business selling these caricatures, which provided most of his income later in his life.
So stick your head in that and smoke it!

My attention span is barely a footbridge

From time to time, I do manage to squeeze a coherent, well-versed essay from my addled brain. However, as much as I want to, today is not one of those days. Instead, I am electing to enlighten you with random little thoughts that have crossed my mind of late.

I love Bond films, and I am biased toward Sean Connery. Especially when compared to the wacky, '70's episodes with Roger Moore and wacky music and bad stop-motion photography. Which begs the question. Obviously James Bond in a finely tailored suit is NOT the same as James Bond with his tweed safari jacket and Sansabelt bell-bottomed trousers. Why then did '70's babes like Britt Ekland, Jayne Seymour, Maud Adams and Lois Chiles simply fall into bed with him? If we're going to do a parody of Bond in the NOW era, wouldn't it be far more empowering for them to reject him cold? To simply chuckle in his face when he tries to be suave in his bell-bottomed Sansabelt slacks? To scream 'Rape' when he grabs their arms tightly and throws them down on the bed?

This is not something a superspy wears. Even if he did get a Chevy Vega from the rental agency.

Oh, and even though I always want Connery to win, and would love to see Moore fail, I still love the episode up above where Homer tackles Bond, resulting in his demise. He he he!

A while back at the grocery store, I discovered manna from the pork gods: a three-pound box of bacon ends and pieces for the same price as a pound of strip bacon that I was going to chop up, anyway. Nothing like frying three pounds of bacon at once to put the whole house in an applewood-induced state of euphoria. A plus, it was Wright Brand bacon, whose marketing campaign includes one of the all-time best call-in radio questions: How can I get my wife to be more like Wright Brand bacon?

And yes, I'm inserting another rad '70's clothing moment. Because how else can we appreciate how far we've come if we don't remember where we've been?

Last week, as part of my weekly movie quote contest, I decided to take it upon myself to catalog all the films I've seen in my life so far. I knew I'd seen a few, but so far, I have over 650 on the list, and somehow I keep coming up with films that I thought were obvious and that I would have listed early on, but they're not there. It also amazes me how many movies I haven't seen in their entirety, despite knowing their plots and intricacies.

A week or so ago, I managed to get my entire desk dismantled into its component pieces, and I only had to drill out one 40-year-old bolt to get it done. Now I can once again park a car in the garage along with both bikes, and we can still navigate around with relative confidence. Which was especially nice this past weekend, because it poured for most of it, and unloading groceries is far nicer if I don't have to walk through the deluge off the roof of the house.

I did manage to stay relatively dry on my ride home on Friday, though I still get a little flinchy on wet pavement. No traction is a bad thing.

The Packers won yesterday, and beating the Bears is always especially nice. Tough thing, though, I didn't get to see any of the game since we're apparently not in prime Packer-watching country. That also means, however, I don't get any of these on my television, while overpaid commentators make generalizations about my home state:

Which could be a mixed blessing, depending on who decides to wear them.

Look at that! No discernable theme, not even any segues. The road to enlightenment blurs before you. Sorry about that. I'll try harder next time.

Has Bacon Madness Jumped the Swine With Bacon Beer?

Always one to share the joy of bacon, and especially if there might be alcohol involved, I must pass along the following article. If there was ever a reason for me to start brewing my own beer, it is this concept. This might even supercede my plans to perfect a bacon vodka.
Has Bacon Madness Jumped the Swine With Bacon Beer? I vote a hearty 'NO'.

Make sure you click the link at the end of the first paragraph, it takes you to another article with direct quotes from the brewer. Color me excited!

(Shared via AddThis)

Something so glorious I'm actually quoting Travolta

I'm having a good day, on the whole. I brought Ruby to work this morning, purring all the way, and didn't even hit any nasty potholes or get cut off by oblivious texters. I made a number of lights so I wasn't sitting motionless above a hot engine too many times.

Work didn't completely suck this morning, and I had one of those rare feelings of work-related adequacy.

Then, high point of the day, I went to lunch and ate my barbecue pork sandwich WHILE READING A NEWS ARTICLE ABOUT BACON! And sure, it's Pulp-Fiction-Travolta, but still, Travolta all the same:

"Bacon tastes gooooood. Pork chops taste goooood."

This is nothing compared to the list compiled by the Royal Bacon Society, the Top 10 Homer Simpson Quotes about Bacon:

1. “(Lisa) “I’m going to become a vegetarian” (Homer) “Does that mean you’re not going to eat any pork?” “Yes” “Bacon?” “Yes Dad” Ham?” “Dad all those meats come from the same animal” “Right Lisa, some wonderful, magical animal!”"
2. “Porkchops and bacon, my two favorite animals.”
3. “When you’re in my house you shall do as I do and believe who I believe in. So Bart butter up that bacon, boy.”
4. “Is it Bacon Day?”
5. “Mmmm. Move over, eggs. Bacon just got a new best friend - fudge.”
6. “Not again! First you took away my Philly Fudgesteak. And then my Bacon Balls. Then my Whatchamachicken. You monster!”
7. (Homer): I’ll have the smiley face breakfast special. Uhh, but could you add a bacon nose? Plus bacon hair, bacon mustache, five o’clock shadow made of bacon bits and a bacon body.(Waitress): How about I just shove a pig down your throat? [Homer looks excited] (Waitress): I was kidding. (Homer): Fine, but the bacon man lives in a bacon house! (Waitress): No he doesn’t!
8. “[strained] You know that feeling you get when a thousand knives of fire are stabbing you in the heart? I’m having that right now…[normal] Ooh, bacon!”
9. “Mmm … bacon”
10. “Mmm … unexplained bacon”

Number 8 is my favorite.

The article, adopted from the Foat Wuth Stah Telegram, indicated there is actually a Texas grocer with 15 different bacons in stock. Wisconsin, West Virginia, Iowa and Texas bacon, bacon smoked with all manner of wood and wood-alternatives (i.e. corn cobs) and the Vosges Mo's Bacon Bar, a chocolate-bacon candy bar I'm sure is worth every penny of the $7 it costs.

Mark your calendars, September 5th is International Bacon Day! You still have time to rush out and buy me this for an IBD present!