The great cross-over post!

Ah, yes. As we embark on this newest venture, I felt I could at least share my most recent posting from my original blog, created back when I was young and full of interesting things to share.

By the hair not on my chinny-chin-chin

All gone. Yes, my face is bereft of all but the minutest stubble of the day for the first time since August 1996. My chin is cold. So cold. It was a whim, something that I probably should have waited to do until I lost the chubsy-ubsy double chin that, apparently, the goatee was hiding. Who knew?

Good grammars is everywhere:

Following is a direct quote from a news article I read earlier today: "Poor visibility was poor near the top of the mountain, which about 15 miles northeast of Santa Fe, state Department of Public Safety spokesman Peter Olson said." Really?

A-pub-calypse Now

As is tradition on our visits to Milwaukee, we must find at least one trashy bar upon which to inflict our rowdiness. It was Bob's pick, the New Yorker, across from the Greyhound Station. Immediately we knew (well - after the ten minutes it took Bob to parallel park) this was a bar like no other. Oddly and fluorescently lit, battleship gray from head to toe, with a subtle 'Jazz and NYC as drawn by preschoolers' theme. The three patrons along with the bartender all showing signs of what movies have told me is shell-shock. The jukebox blaring the soundtracks from Apocalypse Now and Platoon. There were four of us, so I ordered four drinks, got five. An extra vodka-cranberry that was 90% vodka, and Bob's 'Fuzzy Navel'. I don't know what actually goes into a fuzzy navel, but I'm certain it ISN'T 90% vodka, 5% OJ, 5% of some other clear liquid - peach schnapps? - and finally, a shaky, tentative flourish of grenadine. Sometimes you just know when you should be drinking whatever tap beer is available. I was.

My Blue Hawaii

In case you were curious (and I know you are), Boone's Farm Blue Hawaiian, with a bouquet and oily finish like Coppertone 30, is NOT the worst choice of alcoholic splendor when compared to some of the small-run Chardonnays and Pinot Gris from Trader Joe's. Go figure. Perhaps because one EXPECTS Boone's Farm to suck and therefore sets low expectations, but at least it couldn't be used as pancake syrup or hand-to-hand combat. Good times, nevertheless, after our visit to the tavern of the damned.

Separating the White and the Colored

Congratulations, Stephanie! Steph graduated high school last Sunday, and was given a crisp, white cap and gown to wear for the ceremony. As were the rest of the girls. The boys were given burgundy ensembles, and they were split by gender on stage, so they formed two separate blocks of color. They were even called alternately, boy-girl, boy-girl, to receive their diplomas from opposite sides of the stage. Because alphabetically is just so 2008, apparently. The PA system was sub-par, or at least sub-volume, everyone sounded like adults in a Charlie Brown special. Only the first three rows of people directly in front of the podium could hear, as evidenced by their occasional laughter. On another note, how does someone with a last name of 'Stoner' actually manage to get himself elected to the school board? Was the other candidate's name Tweaker?

Government-Sanctioned Torture

Commercial flight, of course. What did you think? I'm convinced that the rows of seats move closer together, like tectonic plates, each time I fly. Yes, I am of an amply-rumped Midwestern build, but this hasn't changed, and yet I feel like somehow I keep getting assigned to the child seat. Half a plastic cup of warm, flat Diet Coke? Yes, please. Rat Bastard who thinks the 'Turn off your cell phone' announcement doesn't apply to him, as he's texting during takeoff? Of course. The guy at security who disposed of his water but kept his juice, because that's not a liquid, right? Whiny woman complaining when her 'window' seat in the last row of the plane didn't actually have a window, and again when the window seat she decided to take had a scenic view of her reflection in the side of the engine? Why not? All manner of miscreants who chose our flight home to be their first taste of commercial flight? Damn straight.

Finally, the highly-anticipated Rental Car Review

It's been some time since my buttocks graced the overused seat of a rental car. My last few trips for work had me staying across a parking lot or across a street from my clients, and this last week was the first personal travel we've had. We live in Florida, people should be visiting us! Anyway, Hertz was decent overall, though the line couldn't have moved slower if they tried. Not the clerk's fault, with one customer barging in line to complain about the oil change light, and another being credit-card impaired. Then there was the father at the Avis line next to us who couldn't actually remember WHERE he booked his car, but was certain that it was one of the agencies in Milwaukee. He hoped.

I booked a full-size car, same price as Standard and Compact this trip, and we're never compact travellers. Given our experience with Enterprise in January, I inquired just what qualified as 'full-size'. Apparently what Hertz considers a full-size car is neither full-size nor a car, I had my choice of a Subaru Forester or a Ford Escape. Opting for the Escape, and walking past a slew of what I would have considered both full-size and car-like, we found our vehicle, loaded the luggage and we were off. Hertz has this thing about renting non-local cars to non-locals, so there's no chance of fitting in - this trip we were from Mississippi, further south than last summer's Lucerne from Tennessee.

For a little SUV and for all the poor reviews I'd heard about them, I had few complaints about the Escape. Hertz now includes Sirius/XM radio on all of their cars, so we had that going for us. Decent mileage, lots of room, could have used a little more pickup up hills. Not the soft luxury ride I'm used to in the Buick, but all in all, a very nice non-full-sized non-car. B+

And now, a BONUS MOVIE REVIEW!!!

The Hangover. Funny, funny, stuff. See it.

The Treasure You Seek

If you have arrived here, it is hopefully because you have tried and failed and really, REALLY need to know the answers. Well, I'm here to provide closure.

1 - L
2 - H
3 - O
4 - I
5 - A
6 - M
7 - Q
8 - G
9 - B
10 - N
11 - J
12 - E
13 - C
14 - F
15 - P
16 - D
17 - K

Bonus question, since you're here: Which famous actor/director changed his name from Albert Einstein?

Sexy time, very nice

From this quiz, take it first...

1) Phoebe Cates' ultimate bikini scene in 'Fast Times at Ridgemont High'

2) Nicole Kidman gets sexy in the rain to this song in a short little sundress in 'To Die For'

3) Demi Moore bursts onto the screen in 'Striptease'

4) Bo Derek insists on making love to this song in 'Ten'

5) Heather Graham gets naked (except for the roller skates) in 'Boogie Nights'

6) Laura Dern rides Nic Cage while this death metal song plays over the top in 'Wild at Heart'

7) Kelly Macdonald is magnificently dirty in the back of a cab to this song in 'Trainspotting' (and in her schoolgirl uniform)

8) Christian Bale expounds on the brilliance or banality of Genesis and Phil's solo work to this song while an escort and a prostitute he's hired have sex with one another for his pleasure in 'American Psycho'.

If you haven't seen these movies, see them. 

Puff Puff Pass/Fail

Don't cheat, kids!  Take the quiz here first.

1) What actor starred in a Disney film under the alias Paul Mall?



Paul Reubens (aka Pee Wee Herman) starred in the 1986 film Flight of the Navigator under the psuedonym Paul Mall.

2) Name the television show that featured a character named Salem?


Sabrina, the Teenage Witch


3) What iconic ad man did Don Johnson usurp for a 1991 film?

Don Johnson starred with Mickey Rourke as 'The Marlboro Man', with Rourke taking on the role of Harley Davidson in that film nobody ever saw.


4) What brand of cigarettes does Bruce Willis smoke in Die Hard? 


Bruce is squarely a Marlboro man in Die Hard, but picks up the villains' Gauloises 


5) What about in Pulp Fiction?


As with every Tarantino smoker, only Red Apples will do for Butch.


6) What Academy-award-winning film is set in Newport, RI?


The 1974 version of The Great Gatsby was set in Newport, and won Academy awards for Best Costume Design and Best Music.

7) Name the brand mentioned by Billy Joel in an iconic 80's song.


In 'Keeping the Faith', Joel sings about a fresh pack of Luckys. 


8) What series of code phrases does James Bond use to identify a fellow agent?


See "From Russia with Love":

James Bond: Pardon me, do you have a match?
MI6 Contact: I use a lighter.
James Bond: Better still.
MI6 Contact: Until they go wrong.
James Bond: Exactly.


9) In which film did Clint Eastwood light a match on the face of his opponent?



This took place in both Hang 'Em High and The Good, The Bad, The Ugly.


10) What is my favorite Kool and the Gang song? (Hint - it's featured in one of the films listed above.)

From Pulp Fiction:  "Tell me again about the hash bars." Background music rocks, too.

Bonus:  Kurt Vonnegut famously smoked Pall Malls his entire life, bringing us back to question number one.

Bond Girls are Easy

Okay kids, no cheating.  Make sure you check out the quiz first!

Which actor has starred in the most Bond films to date?  Robert Llewellyn portrayed 'Q' (or Major Boothroyd) in 17 Bond films, the most appearances by any actor.
    
Which Bond character has been played by the most actors in the franchise history: M, Ernst Stavro Blofeld or Felix Leiter?  Blofeld was portrayed by nine actors in the history of Bond films, one more than Felix Leiter.
    
Which of those characters was played by more than one actor in a single film?  Blofeld accomplished his feat in question two by being portrayed by two different actors in Thunderball, From Russia With Love and For Your Eyes Only.
    
Name two actors to play a different role in a subsequent film than in their original Bond appearance.  (Check the CDS archives for this one, kiddoes!)
    
Of the many makes and models of car James Bond has driven, and given his history of destroying anything he drives, which car has featured in more films than any other?  The ubiquitous Aston Martin DB5 has made more appearances than any other vehicle in the series.  And she's a beauty.
    
What children's author wrote the screenplay for one of the film adaptations of Ian Fleming's novels?  Roald Dahl wrote the screenplay for 'You Only Live Twice'.
    
What non-Bond film did said author screenwrite based on an Ian Fleming story?  Dahl also adapted Fleming's story 'Chitty Chitty Bang Bang' for film.  This film featured Gert Frobe, best known for his role as Auric Goldfinger, and Benny Hill, best known for his role as Benny Hill (pickle pinger op pate, indeed.)
    
Which film featured more actors playing Agent 007 than any other?  The non-canonical 1967 'Casino Royale' featured a plethora of actors and actresses billed as 'Agent 007'.
    
Of those actors, who is the only one to act in one of the 'official' Bond films?  In addition to her appearance in 'Casino Royale', Ursula Andress donned the now-famous white bikini in Dr. No.
    
Who was the best Bond girl ever?  Discuss.  So many choices here, some far better than others.  I've always been fond of Daniella Bianchi ('From Russia With Love'), Claudine Auger ('Thunderball')  Carole Bouquet ('For Your Eyes Only') and Barbara Bach ('The Spy Who Loved Me').  In the end, as much as I'm drawn to Bianchi's character for her beauty, I love the independence and strength of Bouquet.  In the real end, it's such a part of the genre it seems wrong to exclude any of them.

Except Halle Berry.  I mean, come on.